


Don't Call Me That

by maroonweb



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Identity Reveal, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 08:47:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28542777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maroonweb/pseuds/maroonweb
Summary: After class, Peter was still fuming over Iron Lad's comments. He was the youngest Avenger, youngest on his research team, youngest employee at Del-Mar's... Hell, he was still technically the youngest intern at SI if his lab sessions with Tony counted.He was so frustrated at being called "kiddie", "kid", or any other variation of the word. So Peter did what he usually did when he was frustrated: he texted his "friend".
Relationships: Harley Keener/Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Comments: 11
Kudos: 374





	Don't Call Me That

**Author's Note:**

> A quickie for the road. Enjoy!

Briefing meetings, specifically those led by Steve Rogers, were the most boring events to attend in Peter's opinion. Even more boring than taking Comparative Literature and Society at NYU for an elective as a Biomolecular Science major. 

Apparently he wasn't the only one who thought so. 

"Hey Cap?" Iron Lad interrupted Steve's reminders about the importance of documentation. "I think I speak for everyone here when I say, from the bottom of our hearts, that we hear you and we will most certainly write down every mistake Spider-Man made-" 

"Hey!" 

"-but we've got jobs to do. I think my boss would fire me if I was late again." 

Tony choked on the suspicious looking tea he was trying to drink behind a laptop next to Peter. 

"You know who doesn't have a job?" Iron Lad continued. "Spidey! Can't he do all the documentation? He did do most of the damage." 

"What do you suggest I should have done to save that bus? Anyway, I do have a job and I have classes." 

"I'm sure your high school has a maximum number of absences, kid." 

Peter turned to Tony, "I'm gonna kill him. Can I kill him?" 

Before Tony could respond, Steve had decided he'd reached his limit, "Alright, alright! Meeting dismissed, reports are due Saturday." 

Tony finished his tea, "Sometimes, Underoos, we have to resist the urge to murder on a daily basis. Just look at Pep, she's very skilled in the art of resisting to strangle me." 

"Everybody has that skill, Tony," Natasha called back as she walked out with Iron Lad and Iron Patriot. 

"Did you hear something? Anyway, you need a ride? Not from me, obviously, but Happy can drive you so you're not late." 

"No thanks, Mr. Stark. Swinging is faster." 

"Is it? Because I usually get an angry call from a certain aunt venting about how you missed yet another class due to an apartment fire or burglary." 

"The city never sleeps!" Peter shouted running out the door.  
___ 

After class, Peter was still fuming over Iron Lad's comments. He was the youngest Avenger, youngest on his research team, youngest employee at Del-Mar's... Hell, he was still technically the youngest intern at SI if his lab sessions with Tony counted. 

He was so frustrated at being called "kiddie", "kid", or any other variation of the word. So Peter did what he usually did when he was frustrated: he texted his "friend". 

'Need you.' 

'Urs or mine?' 

Peter thought for a moment. Ned was probably still home and Thursday nights were usually reserved for Betty. 

'Yours.' 

'Come on over.' 

He was at Harley's in 10 minutes flat. The poor unsuspecting blond was attacked as soon as he opened the door to Peter. However, Harley was nothing if not adaptable. He picked Peter up, without breaking the kiss, and kicked the door closed with his foot. 

As soon as they made it to the couch, Harley pulled back with a gasp to greet Peter. 

"Well hello to you too, baby." 

"Don't call me that," Peter panted, tugging on Harley's shirt for more. 

Harley shook his head. "Hold on. As much as I love being your much needed... release," he smirked, "You're freaking out about something that probably needs to be talked about. I always call you baby." 

"I didn't exactly come here to talk. You also call me darlin'. Stick with that, problem solved." 

"What's going on?" 

"You're not my boyfriend," Peter rushed. 

Harley's eyes widened at the blunt statement. 

"Sorry I'm just angry at a guy at work and here I am taking it out on-" 

"Did you want to be?" 

"What?" 

Harley sat up and pulled Peter with him, taking his hands in his. "Peter Parker, would you do me the honor of being my boyfriend?" 

Peter blushed, "Are you sure? You said you don't exactly do relationships." 

"I changed my mind. Besides, I'm not exactly looking around anymore. Not since I found you. But are you sure? I'm not exactly 22." 

Peter groaned, "Like 26 is much different. I'm so sick of being treated like a kid." 

"Is that what this is about? Well I promise you I won't treat you like a kid if you're my boyfriend. Not my thing." 

"You'd have to meet May." 

"I'll slay the dragon for you." 

"Please don't slay my aunt."  
____ 

Fortunately, or unfortunately for Peter, Harley and May got on like a house on fire. 

"You should have seen it-" May broke off laughing, "Peter was running around the apartment with his pants around his ankles." 

"It was huge May," Peter practically begged his aunt to stop with his eyes. 

Harley grinned ear to ear, "I had no idea you hated spiders." 

"Only big ones." 

"I'm so glad I get finally get to tell you everything, Harley. I've been begging Peter to bring you over for months." 

"May, we've only been dating for a few weeks." 

"Sure," she raised an eyebrow at Harley's casual arm around Peter. "How'd you two meet?" 

"Harley was a guest speaker in one of my classes for SI." 

"We ran into each other at The Roof right after." Harley supplemented. 

"I liked that bar. Didn't it close down two months ago?" May asked. 

"Uhhhh...." 

"May, Peter tells me you're a nurse?" 

"Yes, I have been for 25 years. What do you do at Stark Industries?" 

"I mess around with the phones." 

"Harley's modest, he's working on making the phones completely sustainable and environmentally friendly." 

"With Peter's help. I feel like I should be paying him." 

"Oh is that why you keep me around?" 

"Nope," Harley smiled. "It's the wealth of Star Wars knowledge. You know how I just love watching it three nights in a row." 

May laughed, "Someone who feels my pain."  
____ 

'Patrol tonight?' May texted Peter. 

'A short one, I'll be careful <3,' Peter texted back. 

'Text me when you get home.' 

May hadn't adjusted well to Peter moving in with Ned. If Peter didn't text her that he was safe constantly, she didn't sleep. Good thing he didn't tell her that his suit was in Tony's shop for repairs. 

Peter shivered in preparation for swinging through the cold night air in his makeshift suit. He jumped and listened for signs of trouble in Queens. 

He found one after a few minutes in the form of a robbery. His plan was to wrap it up quickly before the approaching sirens reached their destination. 

He webbed up two out of the three robbers without warning. 

"Hey guys, it seems we've found ourselves in a bit of a sticky situation," Peter quipped. 

"You said that last time," one of the entrapped robbers complained. 

He looked around and realized that he did indeed recognize two out of the three criminals. 

"Huh. Well maybe you'll consider a new career and I won't have to say it again," Peter aimed his web shooters at the last target. 

"Pedro." 

Ice gripped at Peter's heart, "Excuse me?" 

"That's what Toomes called you." 

Flashing lights illuminated the mysterious robber's face. 

Car doors opened behind Peter. 

"Hands up, you're under arrest!" 

Peter, who knew he didn't look too good in his sweats, slowly raised his hands in the air, but the criminal simply smiled wider and made no move. 

Metal clicked behind Peter, but he knew that the bullet wasn't headed for him. 

He had two decisions: let fate get rid of his current problem or take the bullet for the criminal. 

In that moment, Peter fucking hated being the good guy. 

He shot a web at the remaining robber while stepping to the side to let the bullet hit his back. 

"You shot Spider-Man!"

"You're welcome," Peter growled as he marched past the men in blue. He didn't limp until he reached an alley. 

He pulled out his phone, opened up his favorites, and hung his head in shame as the phone dialed 'Metal Drama Queen'.  
___ 

Harley and Tony were working on Iron Lad's suit later than they'd planned. Hydra's EMP messed with everyone's technology during the last mission and Tony was trying to fix them as quickly as possible, starting with his powerless kid. 

"I told you we should have fixed the thrusters first," Harley leaned back and ran a hand through his curls, resisting the urge to yank his hair in frustration. 

"It only makes sense to do the mainframe first." 

"No offense, Tony, but this wasn't exactly first on my list on ways to spend my Friday night." 

"What? You'd prefer going around to bars and hooking up with random guys rather than spending some quality time with your old man? I'm hurt." 

"You make me sound like some kind of hussy. And for your information, I've settled down." 

Tony looked up from the wiring in surprise, "I thought you weren't the settling down type." 

"I'm not, but... he's worth it. He's the only guy I've been seeing for-" 

A ring interrupted Harley, setting him on edge. The Avengers were a little short staffed at the moment. 

"It's probably just Morgan," Tony said in attempt to calm the tense man. He pulled out the device and looked at the caller ID. "Shit." 

Harley had never seen anyone answer a phone so harshly. "Kid, if you went out without a suit..." 

Tony took a deep breath. "I'm glad you called me. I'm on my way." 

"Is it Spider-Baby?" Harley mouthed in question. 

Tony nodded and squeezed Harley's shoulder as he walked passed. 

"Go get some shut eye, Iron Lad," Tony directed at Harley, still on the phone. 

"Yes, he knows. Serves you right for being stupid."  
___ 

Peter burrowed closer into Harley's chest as he thought about his last conversation with Tony. His mentor had promised to keep a better eye on May, but thought they should tell her about the possible threat to Peter's identity. 

He forgot to mention another person they should probably tell. Peter looked up at his boyfriend of five months (eleven if you counted the more casual part of their relationship). 

"You seem awfully more cuddly than usual," Harley whispered into Peter's hair, pausing Star Wars. "I'm not complaining." 

"Would it be too soon to move in together?" Peter asked nervously. "I mean, I'm already here all the time and my lease with Ned is ending. Plus NYU is closer-" 

"You're rambling, darlin'," Harley pulled Peter up into a deep kiss. "You have a key, half of the closet is yours, and you eat all of my food. Tell me what you need to finalize the move and it's yours." 

Peter's excitement and relief was short-lived as their two phones buzzed together. 

"Work-" They both started and then laughed. 

"Must be a hiccup with the phone launch." 

"Gwen's been begging me to take her shift. She probably called out." 

"Good timing."  
____ 

"Don't say a word," Spider-Man warned Iron Lad as he sat next to him. 

Iron Lad just let out a metallic chuckle at the memory of Tony's exasperation from the previous week. 

"What's this about Tony?" Steve asked. "We don't usually deal with missing person cases." 

"This is an all hands on deck kind of situation. It involves one of our own," he looked at Spider-Man meaningfully. "Underoos, can we speak privately for a moment?" 

Spider-Man tensed, "What are you trying to say, Mr. Stark?" 

"Kid..." 

"No," the conference table shook as Spider-Man shoved himself back and stood abruptly. "No. You promised- I won't- She's not..." 

Spider-Man shook his head, Harley grew concerned for his masked friend. Tony appeared suddenly beside them. 

"Breathe," Tony pleaded, grabbing the panicked man's shoulder. "We'll get her back, but the team needs to know who they're looking for." 

No one moved. The only sounds were Spider-Man's rapid gasps. 

"Deep breaths, Pete," Tony demanded once more. 

"I can't," he ripped off his mask to reveal a familiar face with curly brown hair. 

Harley's own shock was covered by the murmurs and whispers around the room. 

"Kid," Steve jumped in. "We'll find her, but we need to know who she is." 

"May Parker," the words were out of Harley's mouth without thinking. 

Tony's head snapped up, but Peter continued to struggle with his breathing. 

"Peter. Peter. Damn it. S.A.T.U.R.D.A.Y disengage," Harley grabbed one of Peter's shoulders with one hand and gently stroked his face with another. 

"Harley?" 

"Hey baby," he kissed Peter's curls and pulled his head to his chest. 

"I told you-," Peter's breaths slowed slightly, "-not to call me that." 

"Alright darlin', but you gotta breathe with me." 

No one said anything while Peter caught his breath. Once he seemed calm, Tony broke the stillness. 

"So, do either of you kids want to explain this?" 

"Apparently, I'm dating Iron Lad. God, you are such a dick, Harls, you know that?" Peter kept his eyes closed. 

"I'll try not to be," Harley actually sounded remorseful. "How about I make it up to you by rescuing your aunt?"


End file.
